2018 the year that wasnt

I have to say that i don't think a full year has gone more wrong than 2018. I cant think of a single good thing that happened. I graduated my Diploma but now cant use it as my relationship broke apart so i need my steady income to support myself. A dream job i was so sure i would get (i had 3 interviews!) I didn't end out getting. We had my uncle and brother in law nearly killed in car accidents, not to mention another 3 accidents which thankfully no one was hurt. We had those two people in hospital plus my sister, nephew, and step mother at separate times. I didn't lose any weight or pay off any debt or save any money.

I guess no one died, so, you know, that's a plus. I have alot to be thankful for. A well paying job that i can take leave when ever i like. Everyone is mostly healthy and happy.

But the core of the year really just offered me nothing. I feel like i have to wipe the slate clean and just start again for 2019. New goals, new ideas about where my future is going.

My main, number one goal is to quit my job, move to the country and work from home. The issue i have with this now is that i can see no way to actually get from here to there...In the past all my ideas to work from home haven't really panned out. I made stationary, didn't sell, i made dolls, couldn't make them fast enough to actually make an income. I offered my skills as an editor, no one replied. I even advertised tarot readings! I am a published author but make only a few dollars a year and i don't have the time to write at the moment. Some parts of me say to just suck it up and only get 3hrs sleep a night. But another more rational part reminds me that i have a son to take care off and that's not realistic.

I don't like just wallowing. I need to find some way to get there. So I'm frantically reading blogs, books and articles about people who did just that and trying to see how i can make the same journey. It seems to be mostly meet a guy and he will support all my dreams...yeah not a concrete plan haha I have ordered this book, Simplicity parenting, which has been suggested by many a mother that i aspire to be. So, that's step one. Ill let you know if i come up with a plan, we can run away together haha